Monday, October 31, 2011

Counting Coup! A Fictional Halloween Tale of Suspense and Cultural Awareness


I was out doing the tricks or treat thing this evening and saw a couple dressed up like Indians. I did a double take because they looked like an old traditional enemy tribe...so I attacked them, counted coup, war whoops; all that Hollywood, John Wayne stuff. When I realized they were just a couple of little white kids, I ceased my attack. After they got up, broken fake feathers and all, I told them I was "honored" that they were dressing up like Indians. They didn't say much and ran away before they could thank me for honoring them. Yeah, right. Gratitude! 

I left and went around the corner and saw another couple dressed up like Indians; looked like an enemy tribe again...so I attacked. Kicked the hell out of them; gave 'em a couple of pretty hard, stiff Tomahawk chops - all that Atlanta Braves, Washington Redskins, Indian Mascot stuff, and they went down. When I realized it was an old white couple, the grandparents of the little kids I attacked earlier, I put away my weapons and helped them up and told them I was "honored" that they were dressed up like Indians. Between their moans of pain they were shouting something to me; sounded like F this and F you. Yeah, right. Gratitude! 

But, I actually didn't hear what they said because I saw another person that was dressed up like an enemy tribe; had to attack him too. Turned out he was some little white dude from HSU. I helped him up and told him I was sorry that I had mistaken him for an enemy tribe. Before I could tell him I was honored by him dressing up like an Indian, he started apologizing; something about taking a diversity training and he should have known better... What a night! 

When I go back home to my rez and tell my folks what I did tonight I'm pretty sure they're gonna give me some beautiful Pendleton blankets, a feast, and 3 eagle feathers. Probably dance all night. Probably make me a Chief! I was thinking that out here if I actually did this I would get 5 years in jail for assault. Man, it's tough being from another culture; but still can't wait till next year. Happy Halloween!

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